Bimbo, a middle-sized lady, recently complained about sitting in a public bus beside a plus-size lady who, in her words, “refused to adjust for her to sit properly.” Bimbo ended up squeezed and squashed till she got to her bus stop.

She tried moving towards the window and sitting at the edge of the seat, but there was only so much adjusting one person could do. The woman beside her appeared settled, while Bimbo spent the journey trying to find somewhere to put the rest of her body.

It is an awkward situation, especially in Lagos, where public transport does not exactly come with the luxury of personal space. On a danfo, four people can be squeezed onto one seat. In a keke, three passengers are expected to fit into the back, whether their bodies can comfortably manage it or not. Everybody knows the drill. Once the conductor says, “Make una shift, na four four per seat,” you simply find a way to enter.

But what happens when one person takes up significantly more of the available space and does not make an effort to adjust?

The question becomes even more difficult when that person is plus-size because asking them to make room can quickly sound like a comment about their body. Nobody wants to be accused of body shaming, so the passenger who is being squeezed often says nothing and spends the entire journey uncomfortable.

When “shift small” becomes difficult to say

There is a certain amount of discomfort people accept when they enter public transport. Your knees may touch a stranger’s. Someone’s bag may end up on your lap. You may spend part of the journey pressed against the window because another passenger is getting off later than you are. That is Lagos transport.

Still, there is a difference between accepting the normal discomfort of a crowded bus and being expected to surrender most of your seat because the person beside you refuses to adjust.

A plus-size passenger obviously cannot make their body smaller. That is not the expectation. The issue is whether they make an effort to use the space available to them without completely ignoring the person sitting beside them.

For someone like Bimbo, the frustrating part is not simply that the woman was bigger. It was that she allegedly made no effort to accommodate another passenger who was already struggling to sit properly.

This is where the situation becomes uncomfortable. If Bimbo says, “Please shift small,” is she asking for reasonable space or commenting on the woman’s body? If she says, “You are taking my space,” will it be understood as a practical complaint or an insult?

So she keeps quiet.

And the person beside her continues sitting comfortably while she spends the journey folded into whatever little space remains.

Some people know how to make it work

There are also plus-size passengers who seem to understand the problem and make a conscious effort to avoid putting another passenger through it.

Some will choose the front seat when they can because there is usually more room. Others will sit down and immediately adjust themselves, keeping their arms close and trying to leave enough space for whoever eventually sits beside them.

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That small effort can completely change the experience.

It does not mean they are apologising for their bodies. It simply means they understand that public transport is shared. If four people are being squeezed onto a seat, everyone has to make some accommodation for the others.

In fact, this should not be treated as a rule for plus-size passengers alone. A slim passenger who spreads their legs across another person’s space is inconsiderate. Someone who puts a large bag on an empty seat while people are standing is inconsiderate. A passenger who sits at an angle and forces the person beside them to squeeze into a corner is also inconsiderate.

The difference is that with a plus-size passenger, the limited space can become much more obvious, and the person beside them may feel unable to say anything without making the situation personal.

And then there is the issue of hygiene

There is another part of this conversation that people are often even more uncomfortable discussing.

Lagos is hot. Sitting in a crowded danfo in traffic can make anyone sweat, regardless of their size. Nobody should be shamed simply because they sweat. But personal hygiene becomes a problem when somebody’s sweat, odour or lack of consideration starts affecting the person sitting next to them.

There are passengers who raise their arms to hold onto the roof or adjust themselves, only for their sweaty armpit to end up on another person’s shoulder. The person beside them is then left wondering whether to move, complain or simply endure it until they reach their stop.

And moving is not always possible.

In a packed bus, there may be nowhere to go. The window is already occupied, the person on the other side is equally squeezed and standing up may not even be an option.

This is why consideration matters so much in public transport. You do not have to be the smallest person on the bus to understand that the person beside you also deserves to sit properly.

Being plus-size does not make someone inconsiderate, just as being slim does not automatically make someone considerate. But when a person’s size means they occupy more of a shared seat, making an effort to accommodate the other passenger is simply good manners. Perhaps that is the line that needs to be drawn.

Nobody should be mocked, insulted or made to feel ashamed because of their body. At the same time, nobody should have to spend an entire journey squeezed against a bus window because they are too afraid to ask for a little more space.

Cynthia Nwanonyiri